…n remember epiphanies I’ve had about how to communicate and just *be* married over these years too. Realizing that he wasn’t responsible for my happiness when I was depressed ( and giving him permission not to be). Learning how to fight productively, because all couples have to fight sometimes. Recognizing how to create boundaries and carve space for yourself after marriage, with in-laws, with children. This is all work and it is joyful, but I think we do a terrible job portraying marriages in our cou…