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What I See as Effective Coaching

A coaching session is something that tends to happen when I reach a point in my life at which I realize that I’ve been trying to get to some new level of performance or success and that to get there I need the support of another person. Effective coaching can help me move to that next level.

By why do I need another person to help? Why can’t I just pull myself up by my own bootstraps? The main issues are unconscious; I don’t know what I don’t know. I need another organism to introduce new information. But it’s usually not expertise or advice that I need; I can gather information on my own. What I usually need most from the outside is a different perspective on my unique situation.

An effective coach has the skill and experience to curiously explore my inner-world and its relationship with my outer world, helping me to discover the internal dynamics of my current situation that are preventing it transforming into what I desire.

Effective coaching brings awareness to the parts of myself that have been separated during intense past experiences. This awareness leads to integration. This integration, through supporting the past in being lived, reclaims energy, allowing it to be fully harnessed and focussed in ways that lead to my present evolving rapidly into what I consider a more optimal future.

This process of facilitated deep and full engagement with what is actually happening leads to an increased rapport with self—a kind of calm, focused, and content abiding—in which there is an optimal flow of effort. In this state of harmony, trying is not required because there is no internal resistance. There is no longer a battle in which one part wants to move forward while another part holds back. All parts are willing and ready.

A effective coach, through a process of deep curiosity in me, supports me in untying the knots that bind me in place, knots that have kept me repeating a past that I have not been consciously choosing.

Written by

An engineer-psychologist focused on machine intelligence. I write from my own experience to support others in living more fulfilling lives | duncanriach.com

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